Tuesday, January 8, 2013

When I Grow Up, I Want To Be....

What?  Do you know yet?  Have you thought about it all your life?  Did you end up doing what you wanted to?  Did you end up doing what your passion is?

My kids are at that age.  You know, the age, the world expects you to know what you want to do!  I have one who has always known what she wanted to do and is almost through with college so she can do just that.  I think, she is in a minority.  I think, she is one of the lucky ones.

I know I struggled with knowing what I really wanted to do.  I never had the guidance and the backing, nor the encouragement.  I went to different schools, took different majors. I majored in business, was going to be an art teacher, fashion design, thought about social work, pursued accounting at one time, was accepted in to a Commercial Art program that I never went to, and did go to cosmetology school and got a license in that.

So were any of them my passion???  Commercial Art was close.  So why didn't I go, although I had to show a portfolio and was accepted?  I still didn't feel good enough.  To this day, I regret it and wonder what direction my life would have taken if I had gone.

When I went to an actual 4 year college, my major changed so much. I just didn't 'know' what I wanted to do, what I could be good at.  Thinking back, the classes I enjoyed the most, I did the best at, were my English and writing classes.  Yes, I even thought about journalism, but that isn't the writing I wanted to do.

I wanted, and still want to, write books.  Sure, I wrote one, but that was like a big long journal, a story of part of my life.  Yes, I have another one to do, but those aren't the kind I am talking about.  I am talking about writing books of fiction.  The ones you get lost in, the ones you can't put down because you need to know how the story goes, and how it ends. So why haven't I?  Can you guess?  I never felt I wrote good enough.  Lately, the book my sister and I started working on has been majorly on my mind.  I think it is time to find it and finish it and if I have to self publish it, I am fine with that.  I want it done. It feels like it needs to be finished.

So, anyhow, back to my topic.  Here is my question and I hope you will post your thoughts in the comments!

What did you want to be when you grew up?  More importantly, are you NOW doing what you always wanted to for a job.  If you are, it is more than a job, isn't it?  If you are, when did you realize what you wanted to do and how did you get to this point?  If you are not, why NOT?  What was it that stopped you from doing what you really wanted to?  What is stopping you now?

That, my friends, is what is on my mind right now!